I had a friend who was approached by a former friend (someone I trusted, but was betrayed by… so I’ve removed from my life a while back) with a lie about me. To my disappointment, she chose to believe the “former friend” instead of talking to and asking me if this was true or not, and shut me out completely.
I know you’ve recently experienced this because you posted about it on your personal FB page. It’s so painful, I keep wanting to contact my friend, but I stop myself. How are you dealing with it?
Shut Out In The Cold 🙁
Dear Shut Out In The Cold…
Yup… it was difficult for me at first as well. I mean, c’mon now… friends are supposed to at least give you a benefit of a doubt, aren’t they? We all deserve at least that before being thrown out the door.
But as painful and disappointing this experience was, I realized it was a very healthy blessing in disguise.
You see… TRUE BLUE friends know and believe in you… they’ll always have your back, and will not drop you at the first sign of damaging news. If they get hold of sketchy info about you as a person, they will go straight to you so you can take care of it, instead of hanging around and entertaining the initiator of this “information”.
Step back and look at it this way… the friendship was obviously weak. What decent person would do this to anyone? Trust, me… 99% sure it would’ve ended sooner or later.
Now, I see this as people filtering themselves out. It’s cool, because although I may not feel it at the time, I certainly do not want or need contaminated people like that in my life. Seriously… if someone chooses a liar over you, well then, they chose what best fits their life.
And girl, you are NOT a liar. You don’t belong in that world… nor do their inhabitants belong in yours.
Smile… you’re faaaar from being shut out in the cold! Take a good look at everyone who remain at your side… near & far… because they embrace you with the warmest love & respect!
P.S. Lemme know what you think!
Carmen is a mom, life strategist, religion teacher, best selling author, advice columnist, foodie wannabe, and advocate for victims of narcissistic abuse. She is currently living la vida loca in Vegas with her not-so-little human… prepping him for med school while pseudo-adulting, Tahitian dancing, and exploring the delicious world of bubble tea *woo!*