Sure, there could possibly be some underlying issues here, but the point it, I really don’t like it.
It makes me feel gross… so gross that I can’t help but step back and eventually run the other way.
And build a wall of poisonous daggers to keep the offender away from me.
It sucks because I could be chatting happily away with a friend when he says something like,
“I’d like to spend more time with you.”
Or a long-time friend who suddenly asks,
“Is it just me, or do we share a special connection?”
It’s just you.
Or someone I’ve always had fun talking to, texting me after a fun phone call,
“Tell me… does anyone else ever make you laugh as much as I do?”
I’m grateful for the chuckles… but stop.
Even if you’ve said these things to me, this post isn’t specifically directed at you. Because you would not believe how many times women are fed the same damb lines from all different people.
And the thing is… I trust my intuition about the intentions behind the words communicated.
For example, I have a couple of male friends who regularly says things like, “You’re something special”… and I don’t feel any ulterior motives behind it.
Things stay cool… I don’t feel creeped out… everything is right in my world.
But then I’d get the words from others and I’m immediately grossed out to a point where I need to take a few moments to shake that nasty feeling off.
I’ve had to explain this a few times already to those who didn’t understand my backing off… most received it well and we remain friends, only a few went crazy-town one me… with one angrily responding with,
“You’re nothing special. And nobody wants anything to do with you, ugly b*tch.”
Awesome. Thanks for showing me how you deal with conflict, Romeo. Of course, he’s the one who said,
“You’re not only beautiful but very special. I’d like to take you out sometime.”
And yes yes… I’ve had countless well-meaning people tell me it’s because I haven’t found the right guy, but that’s not even relevant. I just don’t like how I feel when someone flirts with me.
So that’s my confession.
Being flirted with (unless you are Chris Hemsworth) makes me feel yucky and I do not like it.
P.S. Lemme know what you think!
Carmen is a mom, life strategist, religion teacher, best selling author, advice columnist, foodie wannabe, and advocate for victims of narcissistic abuse. She is currently living la vida loca in Vegas with her not-so-little human… prepping him for med school while pseudo-adulting, Tahitian dancing, and exploring the delicious world of bubble tea *woo!*